Secrets of Sex

a.k.a. Bizarre

1970 · Directed by Antony Balch · UK

Secrets of Sex, aka Bizarre (1970), is described as a brainy sex flick, with a narrating Egyptian mummy guiding the viewer through a series of vignettes showing what people go through in their pursuit of pleasure. Directed and co-written by Antony Balch, this truly bizarre sexploitation film manages to throw a smorgasbord of inane ideas into its exploration of the battle of the sexes.

Scenes of topless dancers being pelted with tomatoes and cabbage leaves by an unseen, booing crowd, a photo shoot with a bloody climax aboard an instrument of torture called the Spanish Horse, and a blackmailing, leather-clad burglar are just some of the ideas in this steamy pot of sleaze.

Among the cast members are Valentine Dyall as the narrating mummy, Elliott Stein as “the strange young man” with a penchant for pangolins, and Maria Frost as Agent 28, Lindy Leigh. When Frost was given the role, she proclaimed, “I’m a model, I can’t act.” It’s fine, she really doesn’t need to, as the viewer is not interested in her acting skills.

The film was heavily censored on its release by John Trevelyan, head censor at the British Board of Film Censors. Scenes including the Spanish Horse and a group sex scene were cut, and some scenes were removed altogether. It is now fully restored to its full length, with nothing left on the cutting room floor.

The soundtrack is provided by De Wolfe, famous for their library recordings. The music swings from groovy sitar to lush strings and avant-garde psychedelic jazz and a cappella.

One critic noted: “It’s a series of vignettes by turns sexy, horrific and/or flat-out demented. With nods to comic-strip spy thrillers, silent slapstick and memorably perverse touches like the meal of bloodily rare steak and lychees enjoyed by a couple of torture fetishists during a break in their photo shoot.”

Antony Balch went on to direct Horror Hospital (1973), with Michael Gough and Robin Askwith. That was meant to be my starting point with Balch, but I got sidetracked when hearing of Secrets of Sex, and I knew I had to see this first for the sake of research. It was an interesting diversion, but really only a starter for the main course: the truly bizarre Horror Hospital.

Gallery

  • Secrets of Sex — gallery image 1
  • Secrets of Sex — gallery image 2
  • Secrets of Sex — gallery image 3
  • Secrets of Sex — gallery image 4

Trailer

From the score

  • Peter Reno – This Is My City (De Wolfe)

Filed 16 October 2026 by Darren Evanson.

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